Wednesday, March 31, 2010
A Weekly Recap
I opened the blog up to my Face Book account and I have received nothing but positive feedback. A couple of the emails gave me the validation I needed since I contemplated on whether to open the blog to everyone or not. It is weird but it is nice to know that their are other people out there who feel the same way and are in a similar situation.
Last night was our second appointment at the Caring Place. I said all of two, maybe three sentences and I had to interrupt just to say that. I think one of the counselors noticed my frustration and asked "Bill, you have been quite tonight". I wanted to respond with "well, I really have nothing in common with anyone else in the room so there isn't much for me to say. Instead, I said, "I just do not have much to talk about tonight".
Here is the real reason why...
One -- I am a man and everyone else in the room is a woman.
Two -- I am younger than anyone else in the room that has lost a spouse
Three -- I listened to two woman talk about their spouses and how angry they are. I am not angry...at least not at Jen.
Four -- I also listened to these two woman talk about how God was looking out for them.
I do NOT want to get into a philosophical discussion about God and religion...so I am just letting it go...
I am torn about what to write. Opening up the blog has been great - more people are finding it, but I am also cautious about what to write.
Their is so much that I want to write...and look out because I feel a monumental entry in the making. This weekend, with Easter on the way I am sure the emotions will be running high. Translation = Easter holiday, memories, my mind racing so I am sure I will have plenty to write.
Here is a Sneak Preview...
- Jen dying IS the defining moment of my life...I refuse to let it be my girls defining moment in their young lives.
- I am addressing my fears...one at a time.
- I WILL be happy again...I think that sort of says it all...I WILL be happy again.
Yeah...I have a lot to write about...
Inside Bill's Head -- Previously Known as (Inside the Head of a Grieving Single Dad)
In August of 2009 my wife Jennifer passed away from an Anaplastic Astrocytoma Brain Tumor. She was only 38 years old. She left me and our two little girls Abbie and Allie to continue life’s journey.
I promised her that I would NOT become angry and bitter about what happened...in order to do that I am attempting to write to express my thoughts and feelings.
This site is a place where I can express my thoughts, feelings and rants...