Saturday, September 25, 2010
As I said, the summer was good, very good. We all kept busy and it was filled with non-stop activities. Well, a funny and very unexpected thing also happened over the summer…I started spending a lot of time with a certain someone special. Now, understand that this was unplanned and unexpected. Yeah, I went out on a few dates with people and let’s just say the results were very mixed. Then I started spending a lot of time with this certain someone special and things just sort of went from there.
It’s weird, those who know me well, know that I am never at a loss for words, but I am struggling with what and how much to say here. The girls have been very receptive because they already knew this person and her kids. They have played together in the past, gone to movies and have had sleepovers so things have been easy from that viewpoint. We have been taking things slow and are attempting to be as smart as possible about all of this.
A couple of things
I am NOT “naming” this person…some of you already know anyway…and some will be totally surprised. I am not naming her out of respect for her. She is also going through a divorce, which many folks don’t know about.
Here is the deal…I am happy…for the first time in a long time I feel good, I feel happy and for lack of better words I feel “alive”. I haven’t been able to say that for a while. Through the illness, the aftermath, it’s just been a while and it takes its toll on you, mentally and emotionally. I feel good about myself, about the future, about this new relationship.
This is a person that I have known for years. I will completely open an honest here…it feels good to be wanted…needed…to be happy. This past summer could have gone a number of different ways. I didn’t plan or intend for things to happen the way they did, but sometimes even, I have to forgo the plan and just wing it. I am happy people…very happy and it has everything to do with this person.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Where to Begin…
First of all I have just been extremely busy. The end of August included a trip back to New Jersey to see some of my family and some old friends, my oldest daughter’s birthday party, the beginning of school and also the start of soccer season. It also marked one year since Jen’s passing. The good news is that everything seemed to work out well. Sometimes the crazier things are…the easier things get…if that makes any sense.
The trip back to NJ was great. We spent a day at the beach, went into historical Philadelphia to see Independence Hall, the Liberty Bell, the US Mint, the Second Bank, Betsy Ross’s House, Christ Church and took a horse drawn carriage ride through Society Hill, everyone really enjoyed the day. Abbie’s birthday party was really nice and luckily for us the weather cooperated and it was a beautiful sunny day. It was a busy, busy summer and a very good summer.
On a Different Note
A couple of months ago I threw my hat in the ring for the position of Software Director of Core Products at the company that I have worked for the past 7.5 years. I submitted my resume, interviewed, gave a presentation to upper management and was then offered the job. This is a crowning moment in my professional career.
It’s something that I wanted to accomplish by the time I was 45, so I exceeded my goal. It’s something that yes, I planned for in my early 30’s and did it! It’s no big secret that Jen and I were big “planners” and always discussed things, made lists and planned for the future…or at least the best we could. I think it’s important to have goals and a plan on how to accomplish them.
I do NOT intend for this to sound arrogant or cocky at all but considering my very humble upbringing I am very proud of myself for accomplishing this goal. The only thing is that it sort of feels…empty.
I can still vividly remember the conversation that I had with Jen when I set my goal to become a director by the time I was 45. It was on the roof of Six Penn Kitchen, a restaurant in downtown Pittsburgh. We were enjoying a kid-free night out on the town and sat at a table on the roof on roof of this restaurant and we were discussing the next 5-10 years of our lives...it’s funny how much things have changed.
As good as the summer was, I was looking forward to the start of school. I like the routine…well; actually, I NEED the routine! Go to bed at a certain time, wake up at a certain time, I like and crave structure...big surprise I know. I still find it hard to believe at times that I have a daughter in first grade and a daughter in third grade. They both enjoy school which makes it all that much better. They are awesome kids!
I will write Part Two tomorrow or over the weekend…since I have a worse attention span then my kids I don’t want to write paragraph after paragraph and go on and on. I will say that earlier this week I retuned from a trip to California, to see San Francisco. It was a great trip…more on that later.
I appreciate the emails that I received from people asking me how I was doing and why I wasn’t blogging. I didn’t realize how many people actually read this blog so that was pretty cool. We (the girls and I) are doing okay and I will make every attempt to not let weeks go by without writing an entry.
Inside Bill's Head -- Previously Known as (Inside the Head of a Grieving Single Dad)
In August of 2009 my wife Jennifer passed away from an Anaplastic Astrocytoma Brain Tumor. She was only 38 years old. She left me and our two little girls Abbie and Allie to continue life’s journey.
I promised her that I would NOT become angry and bitter about what happened...in order to do that I am attempting to write to express my thoughts and feelings.
This site is a place where I can express my thoughts, feelings and rants...