After some careful thought…I am NOT going to give any additional details on my first group session. I do not want to betray the confidence of what was said in the group and if I went and blogged about it… that would just be wrong. Without going into any details my disappointment, lies in the fact that I was hoping to connect or bond with someone within my group. Unfortunately, it appears that I have nothing in common with anyone in the group. I am the only male, no one else has young children and our circumstances are just very, very different.
Maybe by listening to others who have very different stories I can learn something. Something that will benefit me later…I do not know, but that is my hope. I confided in a good friend and shared my frustrations, and they were surprised that I did not speak my feelings in the group. However, anything I can do to expand my understanding and learn something from this “experience” is sort of my mission right now. I have to be going through all of this for some sort of reason…
This past week was extremely difficult for me. The girls were very aware that St. Patrick’s Day was also Jen’s birthday. I honestly think that this week was worse then the holidays. Over the holidays their were many other distractions, but this week it all revolved around Jen’s birthday. The memories just came pouring back to me…and the girls.
I did my best to keep it together for my sake and the girls…I did my best to stay positive and remember the good times…I am trying so hard to remain upbeat and open minded… and NOT become bitter as I promised…
I am trying hard to remain on the higher road…but…it is becoming more difficult…
Bill,
ReplyDeleteMaybe the group thing is not for you. This is no comparison, but Mark always says to me that he needs to talk to someone that is in the same circumstance as he is but got through it. You know like a husband with kids whose wife has cancer. Maybe you need someone who was in your exact situation years ago to help you see what the future holds.
Of course try it a few more times but don't feel bad if you don't connect. One day Bill you will be able to help others. I know it. Your words are inspiring and I urge you to keep writing. I really feel that good things are coming from this blog.
Keep doing everything you are doing. You are doing real good.
I talked to my friend who is in the Thursday session. She told me that her group is a lot like her. And as you may recall, her situation is very similar to yours. She suggested you ask to switch groups. Just a thought.
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